Three common mistakes men make when proposing

February 12th, 2009 - 1:32 pm ICT by IANS  

Seoul, Feb 12 (DPA) Men unknowingly annoy women by proposing or professing their love in a way that they mean to be romantic but that ends up disappointing their partners.
A survey conducted by a South Korean wedding agency and released ahead of Valentine’s Day, the prime season for proposals and grand romantic gestures, found that the first rule is never to assume.

The poll by the firm Duo of 89 men and 107 women found that a majority of the women chose diamond rings as the most favourable gift while a majority of the men falsely assumed that women want simply sweet words or a song of love.

The survey found, however, that none of the 107 female respondents wanted a song.

The second rule is not to be stingy.

The magic of the moment might be lost if a man makes the mistake of taking his girlfriend out to a place around the corner, Duo said.

“He was handsome and funny, but I dumped my younger date after he brought me to a neighbourhood motel to propose,” said respondent Kim Hye Jin, 32, a marketing manager at a pharmaceutical company. “I felt miserable when I was sitting in such a cheap place at such a moment.”

The third rule is no public surprises.

The wedding agency said a woman on the receiving end of such a bombshell might often feel embarrassed or uncomfortable rather than loved.

A 29-year-old male respondent identified only by his family name of Chung told of a time when he jumped on a restaurant’s music stage while dining with his girlfriend to yell, “I love you”, and read aloud a love letter to her.

What he got in return, he said, was not appreciation but a look of shame. “This is ridiculous,” she told him. “What is this in front of all these people here? Let’s get out of here.”

Playing hide-and-seek with a wedding ring - for instance, by placing it in a cake - is also not considered romantic by women, Duo said. Many found it common and outdated.

So is there a universal way to touch women’s hearts? The wedding agency said many men found this way to be most successful: Prepare champagne, wine and balloons, and kneel down before her and tell her what’s in your heart.

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