Thaindian News

New Delhi, Apr. 12 (ANI): London is so pretty in April. Grey and rainy. I don’t know why these English complain? Getting ready today for a party at the Shah’s Belgravia flat. The invite says smart casuals, so I think just a happy blend of three designer labels will do, a bag, shoes and watch of Italian make should work well.

So, I enter the Shah’s well-appointed flat, Penny (Puneeta) gushes a warm welcome and introduces me as “an old friend from Delhi.” I spot about six people who have already arrived before me. No couples, that is nice because I have come alone too, hubby arrives from India next week, when all of Delhi empties out into Selfridges. Introductions done, I sit next to a very handsome Asian man who introduces himself as Akbar Marri from Balochistan.

So, I obviously said to him, “I haven’t heard about your country, is it in the Middle East?” He looks annoyed and says that Balochistan is a part of Pakistan. Now, how is one supposed to know that, tell me? Do all Pakistanis know where Kanpur or Nagpur is? Why are we Indians supposed to ‘know’ all about Pakistan?

But nobody can say that Sweety Kapoor-Khanna is not polite, so I persisted in talking to him rather than the other handsome man seated next to me who was obviously south-Indian or Sri Lankan, you know dark skinned, but well dressed. Not that I am prejudiced about colour, you know, it is just that South types are a little dark no? Akbar figures that my attention is drifting so he asks, “Are you a Punjabi?”

This I know is a leading question because all Pakistanis speak Punjabi, at least the ones who come to India. I have met so many of them at parties and at Wagah, yes I go there every year…I don’t miss any candle light vigil. I am a peaceknickerboker or whatever is the term. “Yes I am a Punjabi, do Balochis speak Punjabi?”

Again, I seem to have put a foot in my mouth. Akbar bristles, “We are Baloch and the language is Balochi, the people are not Balochi. Do you know that we are very pro-India, we wanted to be part of India at one point of time? But you wouldn’t have us. We feel betrayed by your country’s leaders.”
Sigh! Here we go again, complicated geo-political issues. Why can’t this man just ask me about Bollywood like most nice Pakistanis I meet? And I can ask him about Veena Malik or Shahid Afrdi and his bi-polar disorder. “But now you are part of Pakistan no? We don’t interfere in other country’s internal affairs like Pakistan does, you know, in Kashmir.”

Usually, I never mention the ‘K’ word when I meet Pakistanis, they are very sensitive about it you know, they call it some ‘rug’ or the other…oh yeah dukhti rug, must be some dhurrie in their part of Kashmir.

Akbar says, “But that is just what we say to you guys, you can support the Balochistan movement for freedom from Pakistan and get even with Pakistan. All we are saying is that, you are this huge democracy; it is your duty to highlight the human rights violations that take place in your neighbourhood. We are subjected to extra judicial killings, our women are violated, our youth kidnapped and killed. But India is silent.”

I was getting irritated now. Don’t we have enough trouble with Maoists and Kashmir and the North East, how can we take on responsibility of these Balochis oops Baloch. And we Punjabis want peach, bhai. I want to go to Lahore and do some shopping of that Lawn fabric. They want to buy our sarees. I am sure Prime Minister Singh understands our burning Punjabi desires. If these Baloch bring up these human rights issues to the forefront, then this peace process might get stalled again. Why can’t they make peace with the Punjabis of Pakistan? I mean we are not Pakistanis and we are making peace with the Punjabis of Pakistan, are we not?

It is time to get pragmatic in the 21st century.
Akbar is a nice looking man, but he must think I have some pull-shull in Delhi, which is why he is talking politics with me. Maybe I should tell him that I am not the embassy types, or maybe not. Let me talk to this Sri Lankan who seems quite nice, not the LeT types or was it LTTE. I’ll tell you next week. (ANI)