The 10 things you should know before confessing to an affairOctober 20th, 2008 - 5:55 pm ICT by ANI
London, Oct 20 (ANI): If you had an extra-martial affair and are planning to confess the blunder, then here are few things you should know.
TimesOnline has provided the list of 10 things to know before confessing to an affair.
1. Infidelity is not as common as one might think, for a 2006 online survey of 46,000 people revealed that one in five married men and one in ten married women had committed infidelity during their marriage (BBC’’s UK Lovemap).
2. In case there is no chance that your partner will find out about a one-off misdemeanour on a business trip, and you want your relationship to survive, honesty is not necessarily the best policy.
3. If you are crippled with guilt or you some need advice, talk to a neutral third party.
4. If there is chance that someone else will tell your partner, come clean.
5. If you have had unprotected sex, get tested for STIs and you may need to tell your partner the truth so that he or she can get tested too.
6. The motive of the confession should be a genuine desire to improve or, if necessary, gently terminate your relationship. Don”t confess to ease your own guilt, vent anger or get even.
7. Infidelity is often a symptom, not a cause, of trouble in a relationship, and admitting to it may force you to address the underlying issues.
8. Frank Pittman, a psychiatrist and relationship expert, says there are four types of infidelity - accidental infidelity (an unintended act of, usually drunken, carelessness); the romantic affair (you meet somebody wonderful while you are going through a big crisis in your life); the marital arrangement (comfort while you avoid dealing with a marriage that won”t die and won”t recover); and the philanderer (men who continually need their masculinity affirmed, women who are the daughters or ex-wives of philanderers).
9. According to the UK management consultants Grant Thornton, extra-marital affairs remain the biggest cause for divorce.
10. Only 3 per cent of 4,100 high-powered, but unfaithful, men divorced their wives and married their lovers (Dr Jan Halper, the author of Quiet Desperation: The Truth About Successful Men). And the divorce rate among those who marry their lovers is 75 per cent (Frank Pittman). (ANI)
- Half of Italians have extramarital affairs - Oct 27, 2010
- 77pc of divorced man don't regret cheating: Study - Nov 21, 2010
- How to revive romance in marriage? Take tips from experts! - Feb 12, 2012
- Dating service uses philandering Mexican politician's image - Jun 08, 2012
- Facebook 'fuelling divorce epidemic' - Jan 22, 2011
- Charlie Sheen doubt Obama's birth certificate - Apr 21, 2011
- Anthony probes Lopez's relationship with first hubby - Apr 22, 2012
- Eric Williams' Wife Calls Her Marriage 'Dysfunctional' In "Basketball Wives" - Apr 12, 2010
- Greg Norman's ex-wives 'hurt over his new relationship' - May 10, 2010
- Facebook keeps record of users' former lovers - Nov 02, 2010
- Half of Italians cheat on their partners: Study - Oct 27, 2010
- Collins still has 'shared life' with ex-wife Orianne Cevey - Sep 06, 2010
- 'Emotional affair' as harmful to marriage as sexual affair: Experts - Oct 14, 2010
- 'Thank You' a funny take on extra-marital affairs (IANS Preview) - Apr 04, 2011
- 30pc of Americans commit 'financial infidelity' - Jan 15, 2011
Tags: blunder, carelessness, extra marital affairs, frank pittman, genuine desire, grant thornton, infidelity, management consultants, married men, married women, masculinity, misdemeanour, online survey, philanderers, relationship expert, romantic affair, stis, uk management, unprotected sex, vent anger